I beat myself up. Every single day. I listen and bow to the thoughts that I'm not doing enough. No matter what I do it isn't good enough. No matter how hard I try, I fail. Everyday I listen and bow to these thoughts. Everyday I think about how things could be better. What can I do to make ME better? Then the hope disappears from clouded visions of being too far away from my chance at being rescued.
We all must take responsibility for our lives. The decision is ours. Every single day. We have choices to make. Why then does it seem so difficult to make the right ones sometimes. Why does it seem like no matter what you do you fail. No matter what direction you turn there is opposition to succeed. We all want things out of life. We all have dreams and desires. We all have special talents and gifts. It's easy to get swept away with the rythym of this world and accept things the way they are.
In my years of life, I have learned something time and time again. We control our life. We control which direction it takes. Sure, circumstances can be out of our reach, but it's how we react to them that makes us who we are. I know I reiterate all the time about choices and decisions, but really, thats the bottom line of our life. People who blame God or blame the devil for their life is a mistake. There is going to be a voice you follow. There is going to be a road you travel. There is going to be a thousand directions your life can take, but you choose. No one else can do it for you. Not even a higher power.
I am where I am right now because of the choices I have made. Maybe some people don't agree with my life and maybe some people would judge me in their hearts. But let me tell you something.. you don't know. You don't know what the person next to you has to deal with every day. You don't know what has happened to that person to cause them to make a decision they have made. You don't know a persons heart. Regardless of their actions, their heart might be crying out for something different. So don't judge someone else for where they are. Are you so much better? But we are all here to encourage one another. Don't confuse encouragement and judgement. I'm guilty of judging in the past. But I have to realize that I don't know the whole story about people sometimes. Even people who look fantastic and like they've got it all together, could be dying inside. So, my point is, you never know. Just something for us all to think about.
Just be encouraged. Make the right choices to go where you want to go. Even if you make a wrong decision, it's no mistake. It's something to learn from. But don't give up. Keep trying. Keep going